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The Twelth of June in the Year of Our Lord, Fifteen Nineteen - Late Afternoon
Bon jour et ca va ma cherie! Comment ca va? Touts etes bien!! Mon dieu! My French tongue hath become disgraceful. But not the French in my tongue! Ha!! I do be a bit of a wicked sort of soul, but only in the pleasures of the flesh. Ma cherie, I do feel it be the proper time to address an aspect of my person that seemeth to be the subject of many a conversation, rumor and innuendo - the issue of my virtue and my behaviour betwixt, above, below and in the sheets. I apologize for the shocking and blunt nature of the aforementioned topic of this writing, and Heaven for fend shouldst a member of my family, namely my sister Nan, find these enlightened pages and use them to their advantage and to the detriment of myself. However, the degree to which this topic hath taken doth require a retort on my part. During my years in the Court of France, in service to Her Majesty Queen Mary, the sister of our good King Henry VIII, and later to her most blessed and beloved Queen Claude (the Good Lord bless her soul) I becameth learned in the ways of courtly amour and what better a situation to be to learn such arts as in the Courts of France. This aspect of court life be second nature to the French and public displays of affection be common place and not discouraged. Even His Majesty turned his public affections towards me and being most flattered to be the object of attention and affection of such a charming man, I couldst nay refuse his advances. Her Majesty were not even in the least vexed by these goings on and in sooth didst question me on the intimate details of our trysts promising to guide me in correcting much of my technique. Needless to say I were much perplexed by this as this be NAY the manner in which the stodgy English Court doth express tenderness and affections amongst themselves. His Majesty were quite knowledgeable in the ways of courtly and physical amour and didst teach me many things which I didst bring back with me to the English Court. I do confess however that the freedoms I were able to experience abroad did at one time or another not translate well for me here and lead to a most embarrassing encounter with Sir William Paget wherein I acted on my eagerness for close physical proximity with a gentleman, and didst present myself in a most undignified and unladylike manner. Sir William didst report back to my dear sister of this encounter and my misinterpretation of the term "intercourse" which she hath taken and relentlessly teased me with. As she should be one to let loose her tongue! I do recall a time where she were discovered behind a very large and beautifully embroidered curtain in the arms of one particularly ill prepared courtier who were so startled by my sudden appearance that he didst turn to run away with such a flush in his cheeks and his breeches still 'round his ankles that he didst trip and fall all over himself in the progress of his escape. The poor soul, who shall remain anonymous, were finally able to collect his wits and didst manage to stand with what remaining shred of dignity he didst possess and return his trousers to their full and upright position. He didst turn on heel and walk away with such an air in his step (without a doubt having the knowledge that he too had "known" Nan and were not disappointed) that upon our next meeting he didst thank me for creating an air of excitement he never knew possible when in the arms of a lady. Hm. I didst know of the French affection for affection, however, were not aware that there were some that didst appreciate some of the more, how shouldst one put this, taboo natures of amour. Cest la vie! Zut alors! To my detriment the time hath gotten away from me and I must needs hurry post haste to dine. I shall write more anon! Je t'aime! Marie |
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